"Wait up!" That's what kids say. They don't say "wait", they say "Wait up! Hey, wait up!" 'Cause when you're little, your life is up. The future is up. Everything you want is up. "Wait up! Hold up! Shut up! Mom, I'll clean up! Let me stay up!" Parents of course are just the opposite. Everything is down. "Just calm down. Slow down. Come down here. Sit down. Put that down."
Quote by Jerry Seinfeld:
Popular quotes by other comedians
Norm MacDonald. Norm, you're the funniest man I know. Because these are the other people that I know.
We have white people problems in America. You know what that is? That’s when your life is amazing, so you just make stuff up to get worried about.
Today's ballroom dances like the swim, the frug, the chicken and the monkey are really nervous disorders set to music.
It’s not fucking ADD I’m thinking. I’m thinking about things that are more interesting than you. I’m trying to build the perfect utopian society in my head and you’re talking to me about what? Fucking bowling, I don’t give a shit.
I’m in a whole different part of show business. I’m not even part of Shakespeare in Love.