Quote by Lenny Bruce:

If you're going to stop masturbating, you can't "taper off." You've got to quit, cold jerky!

Comedian
Short bio
Leonard Alfred Schneider, better known by his stage name Lenny Bruce, was an American stand-up comedian, social critic, and satirist. He was renowned for his open, free-style and critical form of comedy which integrated satire, politics, religion, sex, and vulgarity.

All quotes by Lenny Bruce

Quotes by other comedians

People are going to see both of us and think it`s an Abbott and Costello kind of thing. It`s not an easy switch. It`s not an easy transition from TV to film.

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

My sex life is like shooting pool with a rope!

Gentiles are people who eat mayonnaise for no reason.

Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.