David Mitchell

Quotes

If I waited for you to teach Lee (Mack) to speak properly we’d be here all night.

I suppose doing things you hate is just the price you pay to avoid loneliness.

I really wish they hadn't made the set out of asbestos.

No, I guess this is a pretty funny story. One that I’ll never ever tell anyone because of my deep and burning shame.

There's one of those adverts that sort of says 'There are more germs on your chopping board than on your loo seat.' To which the answer is, 'well clearly that's fine, then.'

All quotes and jokes