Doug Benson

Quotes

Like most comics, I just broke up with my girlfriend and the reason we broke up is I caught her lying… under another man.

I just broke up with my girl friend, i caught her lying....under another man.

Thats great applaude to another man having sex with my girlfriend.

Tom Cruise shouldn't try to win Oscars. He should just smile and kick people in the face and leave the acting to Hugh Jackman. Why Hugh Jackman? I dunno; come up with your own example, smart-ass.

Einstein used science to get laid; that guy is a genius… I've been using money.

All quotes and jokes