Quotes & Jokes by Donald Glover / page 6

105 quotes

Kept looking for something to be in with. Follow someone’s blueprint. But you have to be on your own.

Me and Abed have an agreement. If one of us dies, we stage it to look like a suicide due to the unjust cancellation of Firefly.

Usually, if I think something is really funny, I'm not gonna test it. I'll just test it when I'm onstage.

I hate it when you really think you're getting something good... and you don't listen to your dudes when you really should.

I wish I was a book. She could pick me up, flip through my pages. Make sure nobody drew wieners in me.

I personally don't believe people really grow. They just learn stuff when they were a kid, and hold on to it, and that affects every relationship they have.

I come around when you least expect me! I'm sitting at the bar when your glass is empty!

I started doing '30 Rock' and started writing 'Mystery Team' at the beginning of that. While I was doing 'Mystery Team,' I started practicing stand-up. While I was doing stand up, I got 'Community.' It's like I planted trees six years ago, and now they have fruit.

The only reason I'm able to do music is because I'm making money on 'Community.' If I wasn't, I couldn't pay for things.

I'm always fucking childish, you knew that when you met me!

Black men struggle with masculinity so much. The idea that we must always be strong really presses us all down - it keeps us from growing.

You’re always allowed to be better.

This one kid said something that was really bad. He said I wasn't really black cause I had a dad.

I don't talk soft, that's that other dude.

I'm trying hard not to use a specific reference, but you'll probably know it's you after the first sentence.