Quotes & Jokes by George Lopez / page 6
[Seeing Benny's breast implants] My God, Mom! You swallowed a bouncy house!
Finally there is someone that you can invest in that looks like you, speaks like you, relates to things you relate to, and make our culture okay to talk about.
The putts break toward the diamond lane on the freeway here. I had a putt break toward a call box, so I know it depends on what lane. I missed a two-footer because a guy was changing his tire in my line.
When you go to cable, there are no stations and no affiliates and they allow you to do your show.
The average late-night viewer is in their mid-50s and the average viewer of TBS is in their 30s and is largely African-American and Hispanic, already, before I even get there.
And really almost like every TV star who loses his job. Now what am I going to do, everybody asks. What am I going to do now? Like every TV star before I’m going to find some crack. I’m going to get on the pipe. Lose that unwanted 110 pounds I’ve been trying to lose.
It's not even about black and white anymore, because so many people are from mixed backgrounds and mixed ethnicities, and it's just a great time to be able to pull all that together.
I can't pay her back, but what I can do is make her as happy as she thought I would when we first got married.
I didn't come from a background where I saw a lot of loving couples. All my aunts and uncles were either split up or fighting all the time. The only healthy relationships I saw were on TV.
No Angie, it's instant. Like when someone trips in the cafeteria and you're laughing so hard milk comes out of your nose, the guy next to you is laughing so hard he accidentally farts. Boom! Friends for life!