Quotes & Jokes by Richard Pryor / page 4
If you want some pussy, you'll talk all that shit with them. 'Hey, yeah, sure,, the cosmos.. sure..'
To be diagnosed was the hardest thing because I didn't know what they were talking about... And the doctor said, "Don't worry, in three months you'll know." So I went about my business and then, one day, it jumped me. I couldn't get up... Your muscles trick you; they did me.
Even when I was a little kid, I always said I would be in the movies one day, and damned if I didn't make it.
You work your butt off and somebody says you can't have your record played because it offends them. Tyrants are made of such stuff.
Imagine people calling you to find out if you're dead. I've led a real crazy life at times, and I've had many strange things happen to me, but that was one of the strangest.
You can have a film and have 200 white people working on it, and nobody finds anything wrong with that. But if you insist on having a black crew, all of a sudden there`s something wrong.
Unfortunately, the show's success comes at the expense of its biggest asset -- the comedians themselves.
I also say that if there isn't a response to what's been happening to the people out there, there's going to be a great explosion one of these days, and this will not be one of the nicest places to live.
Yes, I'm religious. God has shown me things, made certain ways clear to me.
I had to stop drinkin', cuz I got tired of waking in my car driving ninety.
I was a loner and never hung out with anyone. I never had any friends.
What I never understand about a hangover is, where does the breath come from? You know what I mean? I mean, is someone shitting in your mouth?