Quotes & Jokes by Bob Newhart / page 6

I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If you don't have that, you really don't have very much.

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that. Don't rush into adulthood, it isn't all that much fun.

I think everyone probably starts out sounding like someone else, but gradually you develop your own sound.

It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell phone. It still brings me up short to walk by somebody who appears to be talking to themselves.

Some people wonder if it isn’t unusual for an accountant to become a comedian. It’s unusual for a good account to become a comedian. I was a very poor accountant.