Quotes & Jokes by Janeane Garofalo / page 4

Historically the mainstream media has never been particularly friendly to any socially progressive ideas.

I mostly get takeout, I have to admit - I don't know if that's something to be ashamed of. I'm not much of a cook.

For some reason I get advertised when I travel as a political comedian, which I'm not. Sometimes I talk about it and sometimes I don't.

Well I don't know what the city of Hollywood knows about foreign policy, but do I know that a lot of people do learn and educate themselves about policy and I don't have to be a policy expert to know that this will be a disaster.

Taking into account the public's regrettable lack of taste, it is incumbent upon you not to fit in.

For my stand-up, I always have my notebook with me and if something strikes me, I'll write it down.

Tina Fey is part of a generation of women who have changed the face of comedy at 'Second City,' 'SNL,' in sitcoms and in film.

I feel like the American people are being lied to and manipulated. President Bush is trying to force 9/11 and Saddam together.

Leaving your ears open to the suggestions of others only closes the mind's eye, thereby creating a type of spiritual glaucoma.

You know what is good about these Dixie Chicks burnings or bashings? It's a wonderful, wonderful way for really stupid people to hook up. They meet, they throw some things on the fire, they talk about Vin Diesel, they tell stories about who their favorite Fox anchor is, they exchange phone numbers and in some cases has led to marriages.

To me, there is no greater act of courage than being the one who kisses first.

It sounds like I'm always being facetious. That's why I never get voice over work. 'You sound like you hate the product.'

I do not enjoy when people don't like me.

I don't have a good work ethic. I have a real casual relationship with hours.

Until as women we all say, "No! We are not going to starve ourselves", nothing is going to change. We're our own worse enemies sometimes but I still blame men.