Quotes & Jokes by Ricky Gervais / page 2

They have bits sliced off and tied up and sucked out. I want to say to them, ‘You lazy f—ing fat pig. Just go for a run and stop eating burgers. You might fucking die’.

I’ve created an atmosphere where I’m a friend first, boss second. Probably entertainer third.

Why by a book when you can join a library.