I learned early on, stay away from politics, stay away from religion and don't talk about sports. Those three right there will get you in trouble.
Quote by Gabriel Iglesias:
Quotes by other comedians
When I was a kid, my nickname was Mr. Baseball. Because of the stitches.
Another thing I take issue with are people who take their dogs on "play dates," or even worse, people who choose to dress their dogs up in outfits better suited for homosexuals participating in a gay pride parade. Dog costumes are right up there with something else I find particularly offensive: sweater vests.
I'm a selfish, little pig of a man.