Quotes & Jokes about Sport

28 quotes

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game.

Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!

I don't care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.

I learned early on, stay away from politics, stay away from religion and don't talk about sports. Those three right there will get you in trouble.

Oral sex should be an Olympic sport because it’s harder than curling, and if you’re good at it, you deserve a medal.

Running isn't a sport because anyone can do it. Anything we can all do can't be a sport. I can run, you can run. My mother can run, you don't see her on the cover of Sports Illustrated do you?

Gay people invented sports. Think about it. Boxing. Two topless men... in silk shorts... fighting over a belt and a purse.

Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror.

If no-eye contact sex were a sport, I'm not saying I'd make it to the Olympics, but I like my chances.

Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass.

I think extreme sports are really good for relieving stress.

Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. And when I'm swimming, sometimes I'm not sure which one it is.

Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.

I don't really like politics that much. And I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world.

I don’t believe for a second that weightlifting is a sport. They pick up a heavy thing and put it down again. To me, that’s indecision.