Quotes & Jokes by Chris Rock / page 12
When I hear people talk about juggling, or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy, because 'sacrifice' infers that there was something better to do than being with your children.
Movies have takes. But plays are like life - you don't really get takes.
If you see a black woman with an overweight white man, you know she got effed up credit!
'Cause every woman in here, ever since you were … every guy you met has been trying to fuck you. That's right.
I've seen women who don't have great relationships with their dads, and it all comes down to this: You have to tell girls you love them every day.
Not a Harvard-type education, just a not-sticking-up-a-liquor-store-type education.
It's weird with stand-up comedy. It doesn't really translate worldwide. I want to figure out how do I make it worldwide. Do a special in Africa. Can't beat that. Pull that off, then I will have done something.
Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.
There are people who would like to get rid of minimum wage. But we have to have it, because if we didn't some people would not get paid money. They would work all week for two loaves of bread and some Spam.