Quotes & Jokes by Greg Behrendt / page 8
Don’t be flattered that he misses you. He should miss you. You are deeply missable. However, he’s still the same person who just broke up with you. Remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he’s choosing, every day, not to be with you.
When it comes to men, deal with them as they are, not how you’d like them to be.
If I had butterscotch pants and a cheetah sweater... I'd be just fine.
So, I'm 34. I'm kind of becoming an adult - kind of, I guess. But I know that I am because, the other day, I said to somebody, 'Dude, dude, don't - those are the good plates.'
I'm in an abusive relationship with butter. And I'm the only one getting hurt.
Most people don't want to leave their wife and children behind but many people seem to want to take leave of themselves.
Don’t spend your time on and give your heart to any guy who makes you wonder about anything related to his feelings for you.
Just because he’s busy doesn’t make him more valuable. “Busy” does not mean “better”.
I don't have to edit myself. I get to be me, warts and all, and that's ultimately what people want, and to trust each other implicitly.
I'm about to make a wild, extreme and severe relationship rule: the word busy is a load of crap and is most often used by assholes. The word "busy" is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact in every silo you uncover, all you're going to find is a man who didn't care enough to call. Remember men are never to busy to get what they want.
Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing's wrong, but every breath hurts.
It is in that moment, when you really lay down your cards and see the relationship for what it was, that you'll find the freedom to kick it in the ass and let it go.