Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 19
You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
You might be a redneck if there is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.
You might be a redneck if you think a 'cursor' is someone who swears a lot.
It seems like movies that have heart to them always do well, and they find their audience.
You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the "day my ship came in."
I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
You might be a redneck if you have a Hefty bag on the passenger side window of your car.
You might be a redneck if you've ever barbecued Spam on the grill.
You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.
Talking with Gary Busey is kinda like sex. You want to do it, you just don't want to be alone when you do it.
You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.
You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.