Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 25

You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.

I really don't require a whole lot in life.

You might be a redneck if you have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.

You might be a redneck if you've ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.

You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.

You might be a redneck if you pick your teeth from a catalog.

You might be a redneck if momma taught you how to flip a cigarette.

You might be a redneck if you consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.

You might be a redneck if... your child's first words are 'Attention K-Mart shoppers!'

This book is just a collection of my drawings. I never really showed them to anybody but my wife, and she always laughed at them.

As a comic, you learn to use your voice because you don't have the benefit of visual things.

The CMT folks, there was a genuine enthusiasm that I've never had in television before on the executive side.

You might be a redneck if Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people".

You might be a redneck if you hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.

You might be a redneck if you've totaled every car you've ever owned.