Quotes & Jokes by Steve Martin / page 3
If you're studying Geology, which is all facts, as soon as you get out of school you forget it all, but Philosophy you remember just enough to screw you up for the rest of your life.
The new phone book’s here... The new phone book’s here... This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need... My name in print... That really makes somebody... Things are going to start happening to me now.
I could never be a woman, 'cause I'd just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
This film is only for Madagascar and Iran, neither of which follow American copyright law.
I have found that - just as in real life - imagination sometimes has to stand in for experience.
Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.
I'd thought I'd spend time with the kids so they don't turn out weird.
I think when the movie `Roxanne' came out, which I also had written, I felt something new that I never felt, which was respect.
I started a grease fire at McDonald's - threw a match in the cook's hair.
It's kind of a dream come true, because we've always loved these films. We've loved this character, and now we have the opportunity to not remake the movie, but to play these characters. It's like playing Hamlet.