Jack and Jill went up the hill Both with a buck and a quarter, Jill came down with $2.50.
Andrew Dice Clay Quotes and Jokes
I like a bush. A nice big, hairy, stinky, smelly fucking bush. And I hate when they put cologne on it. They dummy it up with cologne like you don’t know where you are. I like that nice natural scent of salmon.
Twinkle twinkle little star, Will she blow me in the car. I bought her dinner, she had fun. My balls are boiling, I'd like to come.
If my girlfriend brings home a nice looking friend of hers, I fuck her on principal. You know what I mean? Don't throw another bush in front of my face. What do you think I'm gonna do? Talk to it? I'm gonna bang it.
I don't drink to get happy or to forget the pain. I drink to stop the voices in my head. Do you know what's so bad about them, they stutter. Ddddave... Kkkikikill your papapaparents!
People are taking the act too seriously. The Diceman character is a macho moron. It's juvenile comedy. I just like to make people laugh.
I think the best part of being gay is when you're done, you could turn over and talk about football.