Quotes & Jokes by Bob Saget / page 8
Even John's dick has a great hairline. On "Full House," John's dick had a mullet.
There was this whole middle time that only Chris Rock came out of, you know, 10 years ago it was Chris and a few other people, but that's about it. Chris is in a class of his own; I don't see another comedian who I put in high regard as him.
The other day my twelve-year-old says to me, "I don't feel like I'm with you right now. You're in the car with me, you're checking your e-mail, you're not listening to me, I don't feel like I'm with you." And I say, "You know what? That was your mother's gripe, too. And she was right. And you're also correct." When you cop to something, you get to the next level. In this case, the next level is: I just learned something from my twelve-year-old.
My favorite Dylan song? I think it's 'Just Like a Woman.' It always makes me cry.
I don't call her my middle child, I call her my center child, Because the world revolves around her.
It's a new day: Full of promise and love. The only thing that can take away that great feeling is - reading the news or speaking to people.
It was a job; the video show was a job; you don't tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o'clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too.
If you laugh at that, you lower the bar, and I will limbo under it because I am a fucked-up guy!
"The videos are hysterical. Almost matching Bob Saget's creative introductions to them". Actually, my parents said that. But then they also once said, "We're very disappointed in you, Bob." They said that, but that was before I had this show.
I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it's fantastic and it makes me very happy. I'm dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet.
I'm fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people, and they all want to be a penguin.