Quotes & Jokes by Chris Rock / page 11
I'm happy if everybody else is. I'm a big brother, the oldest. If you're happy and I'm not, I'm cool with that. If I'm happy and you're not, I'm sad.
You know those guys that go to the strip club at the daytime? If you're at a strip club, and the sun is out, you got some problems!
Every comedian has a moment in his life when he realizes he's a little bit different from everyone else. It's like being the only guy in a movie who sees the ghost. The ghost talks to you and you talk to him. Then you turn to your friend and say, "Hey. Do you see that ghost?" And he says, "What ghost?"
I've seen women who don't have great relationships with their dads, and it all comes down to this: You have to tell girls you love them every day.
Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.
The material comes from whenever you realize that you and someone else have something in common. So any conversation you've had more than once, anything you see happening to you that you see happening to a friend, you go, "Hmmm, that's a situation I can make funny."
I'm never proper or careful, but I never curse in front of my mother, either.
After I left high school and got my GED, I studied broadcast journalism for a year at a community college.
Anyone who makes up their mind about an issue before they hear the issue is a fool.
If you see a black woman with an overweight white man, you know she got effed up credit!
Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous.