Quotes & Jokes by David Cross / page 4

98 quotes

Sketches have characters, exits, entrances and are vastly different.

We get to see it! January 1st, 2000! We get to see... all those fundamentalist preachers having to do their backpedaling when the Armageddon doesn't occur.

There are really funny alternative comics and really funny straight comics who write and perform traditionally.

Some of those heckling parts are just great on their own plus they happened at that moment so we had to include it.

You have to have some level of attachment, you can still have passion and believe but it has to be softened somewhat.

When we were on the bus doing the Mr. Show Hooray for America Tour there was a lot of laughter and a lot of pot smoking and a lot of speed metal listening and video game playing. Of course that was all Brian Posehn.

I'd be curious to find out, but I don't think people in the entertainment industry are proportionally more or less serious politically than anyone in the landscaping industry.

You can't just yell jokes at people.

And then Jesus answered him, Jesus said, 'Well, my son...that is when I was helping one of the other five billion people on the planet, you selfish fuck. C'mon! You were walking back to your Malibu beach colony home and stubbed your toe on some driftwood, it's not a fuckin' emergency, alright? There's other people with real problems.'

And y'know, they're God's representatives, so that means... God fucks little boys.

The best thing about me is there are no skeletons.

Then I will tape the sets and even though I'm not very successful sometimes I will try to cut out the fat and put the jokes closer together.

There is also a kind of mean-spiritedness with LA comics.

In New York there isn't that weird palpable competitive thing where it's friendly but everyone isn't trying to top one another with jokes when you're just hanging around.

We are just pleased to help out, ... We want to help people that may be evacuating the Gulf Coast area to have some normalcy and take their minds off Hurricane Katrina for a couple of hours.