Quotes & Jokes by Donald Glover / page 3

An elephant never forgets, so my dick remembers everything.

When I wanna be a superhero I just wake up.

I have an obsession with books about kids with Asperger's syndrome.

It's the hand job of cereals 'cause it's like, 'This is pretty good, but you know what I really want.'

I think the best music videos are the ones that have nothing to do with the song. Those are all my favorites.

Revenge is for the weak so I have settled my vendettas with all of the kids who made my early life a living hell.

I feel like… I don’t have a wife, I don’t have a kids, but… I see rappers and I’m like, I know that’s fake. I know how much you make, this is all bullshit. But people are buying into it, and you shouldn’t have that power. I’m legit trying to make honest moves so that all of us can grow. I want to make a show where my sister can work on and become a producer because she can’t get in, no one’s leting her. I want to make things where people can actually grow. A place where people can actually be honest.

I wanna go to rehab and compare penises with famous people.

I don’t want to be niche… I want to be as big as I can be. This album is not a rap album, I want to make pop. I don’t mean pop like Katy Perry, and I love that, I’ll play that shit at my wedding, but… Peter Gabriel’s pop, Hall & Oates was pop… but I want it to be real.

I think it started when she said she's happier without me. I can't really blame her 'cause I'm happier without me!

Careers very rarely are a waste of time; jobs usually are.

We're afraid to move on, that's why there's so much nostalgia on the internet... 'cause we don't wanna look forward, that's scary.

Love it when you're smiling.

My swag is always capital and live in north Virginia.

The thing about stand-up was, I was doing all this sketch and YouTube stuff where I was not being censored and I got to do my own thing, and it was really cool.