Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 11
You might be a redneck if you think a Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy.
This one goes out to the younger ones out there. If your mother still drives you to school, you ain't no "gangsta", pull your pants up! Your back pockets should not be behind your knees!
You take a normal guy, give him a wife, give them time, and you've got an idiot.
By the time we get to church, I need church cuz I've been yelled at by everyone in the family.
As an actor, there was that freedom of not having to worry about lights or marks or other people. It was just going out there and having fun with the character.
You may be a redneck if... you think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.
You might be a redneck if you call your boss "Buddy", on a regular basis.
You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
You might be a redneck if there is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.
You might be a redneck if people are scared to touch your wife's bathrobe.
You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.
You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.
You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.