Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 14
You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.
You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
You might be a redneck if... you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors.
You might be a redneck if your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
You might be a redneck if you move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.
You might be a redneck if you refer to your wife and mother-in-law as "dual air bags".
You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.
You might be a redneck if you think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother's tooth.
You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
You might be a redneck if... you think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader.
You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.