Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 19

You might be a redneck if your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener.

You might be a redneck if your screen door has no screen.

It seems like movies that have heart to them always do well, and they find their audience.

You might be a redneck if you've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.

You might be a redneck if you've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.

You might be a redneck if you have a Hefty bag on the passenger side window of your car.

You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.

You might be a redneck if someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle.

You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center.

You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.

You might be a redneck if there is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.

You might be a redneck if your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced, "The feud is back on!"

You might be a redneck if you have to go down to the creek to take a bath.

You might be a redneck if you've never paid for a haircut.