Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 25
You may be a redneck if... you think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.
If your wife’s hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
You might be a redneck if you have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.
Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist.
The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.
You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.
You might be a redneck if you were shooting pool when your kids were born.
I was talking to Alan Jackson. He had his second Greatest Hits album. He said, You don't ever get into this really thinking you're gonna make it.
You might be a redneck if you use the O on a stop sign to sight your new rifle.
If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
You might be a redneck if your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener.
You find out that all this stuff you've accumulated, you could care less about it. It's just the relationships that matter.
You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a tube top to a wedding.