Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 25
You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.
You might be a redneck if you've totaled every car you've ever owned.
I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and my oldest daughter is 14. I've got four more summers with her. I'm not giving away nine weeks of her summer to go do a silly movie.
If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. Now those little baby spare tires are kinda cute; tractor tires aren't! Especially if they've got hair on them!
You might be a redneck if Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people".
If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.
You might be a redneck if none of your shirts cover your stomach.
You might be a redneck if you consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.
You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
You might be a redneck if you hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.
You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
You might be a redneck if you can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.