Quotes & Jokes by Jeff Foxworthy / page 28

461 quotes

You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.

You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.

You might be a redneck if you've ever held somebody up with a caulk gun.

You might be a redneck if you have started a petition to change the National Anthem to "Georgia on My Mind".

You might be a redneck if the biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.

You might be a redneck if there has ever been crime-scene tape on your front door.

You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.

You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.

You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.

You might be a redneck if you consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.

You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.

You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.

You might be a redneck if someone tells you you have something in your teeth, and you take them out to see what it is.

I wasn't paying attention, what was wrong with me?

You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.