Quotes & Jokes by Kevin James / page 2

I just want to put some positive stuff out there. If it works, great. If it doesn't, no problem.

Teachers have a chance to mold someone, inspire them. I hope all teachers realize that.

There, there's your skin-flap. That piece that looks like my ass caught fire and somebody put it out with an old t-shirt is yours.

Just me onstage with a mike having an intimate relationship with the audience. I don't get nervous for that. I just get excited.

Now I'm starting to jog. But every time I do jog I have 9-1 pressed into my phone, with the next '1' ready to be launched in case I drop.

I'm not a Hollywood guy.

I took a public speaking class in college and managed to make the class laugh a little bit.

Every time I do a movie where it gets physical, I say never again.

You think school ends when it ends, but it doesn't.

I want to do movies that I'm proud of where my kids, at some point, can see and I can feel comfortable sitting there watching it with them. And just that move people. That make people feel a little bit better about themselves when they leave the theatre.

I'm not a gay man, but I will say this: I get it now. I know what all the hype is about.

From there, I tried out for a community theatre play, joined an improv group... it all started opening up.

My favorite movie of all time is 'Rocky.'

It's always cool to meet people who can do things that you have no capacity to do.

You know, when you're a fat guy you don't need a reason to sweat. Guys come up to me and go "Jeez... what have you been doing - jumping rope in the attic or something?" "Umm, no... I peeled an orange about an hour ago, why?"