Quotes & Jokes by Louis C. K. / page 10

Life isn't something you possess. It's something you take part in, and you witness.

The Greatest Generation gets too much credit. Those World War II guys, if they had all the shit we have today, they'd be assholes too. It's just circumstantial. It's what you're called on to do that makes you great. We haven't been called on to do anything but buy shit and get fat.

I definitely look at my body and I go: 'Yuck.'

I like all ladies of all different ages.

Being popular with an audience is a very rickety ladder to be on.

I would rather be with my kids than anybody else.

Everything that’s difficult you should be able to laugh about.

I have a crazy amount of different jobs, so the way I manage that is to not do more than one at a time. It's like old computers that had small memory chips, they would do something called swapping, where they would fill the memory with one task, do it and get it out.

The problem is, the more famous you get, the more people see you who didn't choose to.

We spend all our time now on customer service phone calls. I used to read when I was on the toilet, but now that's when I make customer service calls.

A household name is like ketchup. Everybody wants ketchup. Ketchup doesn't hurt anybody.

I don't believe in this idea of, 'That's hate speech, stop it.'

It's easier to cancel a show if it's expensive.

Most people are dead. Did you know that? It's true, out of all the people that ever were, almost all of them are dead.

There's been a lot of simple vilification of right-wing people. It's really easy to say, 'Well, you're Christian, you're anti-this and that, and I hate you.' But to me, it's more interesting to say, 'What is this person like and how do they really think?'