Quotes & Jokes by Mort Sahl / page 5

Obama is running again for spite.

Remember when movies were just good or bad, before auteurs, film festivals, and guys from USC who were the first to shoot underwater?

I don't think crucifixion is the answer. I believe in the resurrection. I like that part of the story.

Hillary’s explanation of the Libyan action to Congress was so good, I wonder who explained it to her?

I went to computer class with my Dell and I was bullied by a guy with a Mac.

You know me, I love lost causes.

Those who the gods would make rich and famous on TV, they first drive mad.

New book on Malcolm X says we don’t know how he was killed. Want to bring in the FBI. Maybe they were in already.

If anybody comes up to you and says, "My kid is a conservative - why is that?" you say, "Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?"