Quotes & Jokes by Red Buttons / page 7
Old McDonald, who said on his honeymoon, "Ee-eye-ee-eye-oooohhh!!!" Never got a dinner!
Elizabeth Taylor, who recently built a halfway house for girls who don't want to go all the way. Never got a dinner!
Burt Reynolds, great sex symbol of the movies, who said, "I owe it all to one great part." Never got a dinner!
Flash Gordon, who said, "No, that’s not how I got my name." Never got a dinner!
The Hunchback of Notre-Dame, who said to his tailor Irving, "Forget the slacks - please work on the blazer!" Never got a dinner!
King Solomon, who said to his thousand wives, "For better service, take a number." Never got a dinner!
Moses, who said to the children of Israel, "Wear your galoshes; I never did this trick before." Never got a dinner!
Dinah Shore? Wonderful woman. Dinah formed a foundation to locate missing senior citizens by putting their pictures on prune juice bottles.
Alex Hailey, who traced his roots all the way to the back of the bus. Never got a dinner!
Jack the Ripper’s mother, who said to Jack, "How come I never see you with the same girl twice? " Never got a dinner!
Gandhi, who went to Wendy’s and asked, "Where’s the belief?" Never got a dinner!
Lee Iacocca, who said to Dolly Parton, "Why do you need an airbag?" Never got a dinner!
The Hunchback of Notre-Dame, who said, "This isn't a hump. I ate a canteloupe and it backed up on me." Never got a dinner!