Quotes & Jokes by Sandra Bernhard / page 3
I don't need to be redundant to the gay community about what's wrong and what isn't happening for them.
I don't want someone coming in and passing judgment on my life.
The fumes are killing us, and we wonder why things are going haywire.
I didn't belong when I was in high school. Now people are trying to buy lips.
Hip doesn't really come into play anymore as far as I can tell.
I'm very much a humanist. I'm very much pro-choice. I'm very much politically correct.
Onstage, I'm still wearing my fabulous, sheer dresses because I'm not that big.
How far can we go? How much can we absorb and still have some peace of mind?
Kids need to be educated about sex and sexuality and if they're going to have sex, learn how to protect themselves and not get pregnant.
I would be dishonorable in a relationship because I wasn't getting what I wanted from that person.
I'm not saying I'm some high priestess. I do things, I'm sure, that are damaging, but it's certainly not on purpose.
I'm trying to appeal to the disenfranchised everybody, not just specifically gay.
I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes.
I don't like surgery. I don't like elective surgery, I don't like surgery that you have to have.