Quotes & Jokes by Bill Cosby / page 9

Have you ever had a cookie? Then you won't get any here either.

The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.

Lasting harmony with a woman (was) an undertaking in which I twice failed rather disgracefully.

You can teach an old dog new tricks. You just don't want to watch the dog doing them.

The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.

Why do kids always say peace out, I though peace was in.

Never say to younger people "that was before your time," because the last full moon was before their time!

The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.

Repeat after me. I promise not to run outside of the house. I promise not to run inside of the house. I promise not to touch, pick up, step on, anything that looks interesting.

I've got a Ferrari. VROOM! I do 104 from the garage to the front door.

Fatherhood is asking your son to make up a name rather than tell anybody who he is.

Take that money and build something you can see... something for the children.

Old is always fifteen years from now.

That married couples can live together day after day is a miracle the Vatican has overlooked.

In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck - and, of course, courage.