Quotes & Jokes by Dov Davidoff / page 10

Perhaps being hated in the right way is preferable to being loved in the wrong one.

Is it cynical to assume that anyone smiling is a liar and a criminal?

You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.

Perhaps depression is a perfectly natural reaction to the human condition.

Someday I'd like to be a father, not of a human child, but something more reasonable.

I think you're retarded, and not in the cute way.

To understand one's self is to understand all of humanity, unless you're like my friend Mike, he's a fuckin' idiot.

When rappers call each other "son" it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.

Being a white supremacist is like getting into porn. At some point you gotta be like, "what the fuck was I thinking?"

I spend so much time alone that whenever I see my shadow I feel crowded.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

I'm passionate about gay rights, but I think we need admit that there are some gay wrongs as well.

How can there not already be a rapper named 'O'pinion'?

My bedroom is so messy, if I died of natural causes, the cops would be like "no he didn't, clearly there was a struggle".