Quotes & Jokes by Bill Cosby / page 7
It is a point of pride for the American male to keep the same size jockey shorts for his entire life.
A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
Some authority on parenting once said, "Hold them very close and then let them go." This is the hardest truth for a father to learn: that his children are continuously growing up and moving away from him (until, of course, they move back in).
People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what's bitter and move on.
My childhood should have taught me lessons for my own fatherhood, but it didn't because parenting can only be learned by people who have no children.
You can never give complete authority and overall power to anyone until trust can be proven.
My eleven year old daughter mopes around the house all day waiting for her breasts to grow.
Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think - in a deeper voice.
College was a wonderful time - except, of course, when it was trying to teach you things.
Anyone can dabble, but once you've made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and it's very hard for people to stop you.
There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right.
My mother was an authority on pigsties. This is the worst looking pigsty I've ever seen in my life.