Quotes & Jokes by Bob Hope / page 6
Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off, and it was so successful she turned it into a series.
They said I was worth $500 million. If I was worth that much, I wouldn't have visited Vietnam, I'd have sent for it.
It sure has been a pleasure for us to broadcast for the sailors and soldiers; besides, its part of the National Defence Program to prepare our boys for anything.
My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.
I led such a sheltered life I didn't go out with girls until I was almost four.
I was on the way to my hotel, and I passed a hotel going in the opposite direction.
Today's ballroom dances like the swim, the frug, the chicken and the monkey are really nervous disorders set to music.
When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.
I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.