Quotes & Jokes by Dave Chappelle / page 5

You know you must be doing something right if old people like you.

Comedy is a very approval-oriented field.

There's something about doing stand-up that's cathartic.

I'm off to the gym. Replacing good character with good looks is a cornerstone of my comeback stratagem.

I'm not smoking crack. I'm definitely stressed out.

My generation is under-entertained.

I got a lot of positive people around me.

I'm cool with failing so long as I know that there are people around me that love me unconditionally.

I love my jokes.

The higher up I went, the less happy I was.

Have you ever watched, like, a cartoon that you used to watch when you were little, as an adult? I was sittin' there with my nephew. I turned it on Sesame Street. And I was, like, "Oh, good. Sesame Street. Now he'll learn how to count and spell." But now I'm watching it as an adult and I realize that Sesame Street teaches kids other things. It teaches kids how to judge people and label people. That's right. They got this one character named Oscar. They treat this guy like shit the entire show. They judge him right to his face. "Oscar, you are so mean. Isn't he, kids?" "Yeah. Oscar, you're a grouch!" He's, like, "Bitch, I live in a fucking trash can! I'm the poorest motherfucker on Sesame Street. Nobody's helping me." Now you wonder why your kids grow up and step over homeless people, like, "Get it together, grouch. Get a job, grouch."

The world can't tell you who you are. You've just got to figure out who you are and be there, for better or worse.

I wasn't crazy but it is incredibly stressful.

No one calls 911 cool and relaxed. Now that shit would sound ridiculous.

I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it.