Quotes & Jokes by Dov Davidoff / page 15
I'm pretty sure whoever said, "people are wonderful" spent very little time with people.
I like to be able to connect with people. And that’s how I connect, right away. I like to really talk to somebody. To me, it makes my night more interesting.
Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
Vegas; one of the few places still encouraging men in their fifties to dress like their in a boy-band from the 80's.
Another thing rappers, I admire your rebellious spirit, but materialism is a form of mental slavery. Slow down on the jewelry, pick up a book.
The only time used underwear is valuable is as evidence during a rape trial.
I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.
We're born alone and we die alone. So in between, let's spend time with people that make us feel good... or at least put-out.
The best thing about bugs is their lack of self consciousness, also the ability to fly doesn't hurt.
Parenthood seems really rewarding... like martyrdom, but without the glamour.
It's difficult to feel silly and depressed at the same time, but I manage.
Gotta get rid of these free radicals, but first I need to figure out what they are.
One day I'd like to beat you at your own game, but your game is badmitton so that will probably never happen.
Sex sells, but doesn't work so well as a strong-arm tactic. "Give me your purse or I'll make out with you so hard".