Quotes & Jokes by Dov Davidoff / page 17
You can tell a lot about a person by whether or not they're a transvestite.
This relationship is preventing me from becoming everything I can be as a world class masturbator. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
The Statue of Liberty really is profound, I just wish she'd lighten up a bit.
People shouldn't take my lack of interest in what they're saying personally. I don't really care about what I'm saying most of the time.
"We're in this together" usually means "I'm here for you, unless it requires me getting into my car anywhere near rush hour".
Every time I see someone taking care of a baby, I think "why in the world would anyone willingly saddle themselves with that responsibility"?
Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.
TV can be an acronym for television or transvestite. I prefer using it to describe the the latter. The former is strange and undignified.
The Middle East is America's 'champagne room'. No matter how much you spend, you will still never get what you want.
Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I'm less of a man than I'd like to be.
America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.