Quotes & Jokes by Dov Davidoff / page 18

Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.

I wish you'd say that to my face. Not because I'm offended, but because I'm lonely and could use the company.

I don't like the term 'intercourse'. I've always described sex as having taken her vagina 'into custody'.

The world treats beautiful people like they're good at something, which makes it so that they almost never get good at something.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

The worst part about people with bad personalities is they don't know it.

It's difficult to feel silly and depressed at the same time, but I manage.

Whenever I'm around people it causes me to feel nostalgic for the loneliness that drove me into their presence in the first place.

Celebrated father's day by congratulating myself for not having a kid.

I'm endlessly amazed by what people are capable of, and incapable of.

You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.

Sleep is over rated, then again so is being awake.

I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.

I can always tell when a girl comes from a good family because she's what's known as "not at all attracted to me".