Quotes & Jokes by Drew Carey / page 5
George Carlin is kind of my template now because George Carlin before was straight laced regular comic and he had short hair, a tie, suit, nightclub guy. Then he said screw it, let his hair grow, just started telling what he thought was the truth. So that's what I'm trying to do.
When asked if he enjoys being famous: Sometimes I like it, sometimes I don't. I've always been a people watcher. I like to go to malls and just sit, and I can't do that very easily anymore.
Thousand points for everybody! Usually a thousand, but for you, nine ninety-nine! Nine ninety-nine! I'm giving the points away, only nine ninety-nine! I'm craaaazy!
The first Monopoly game I played with my brothers, I hated losing so much, I just had to beat them.
I just liked stand-up comedy so much. I used to memorize Bill Cosby albums and other people's albums, George Carlin, Flip Wilson.
As you know, I'm from Cleveland, Ohio. I love Cleveland, Ohio. I based my whole career on being from Cleveland, Ohio. And you also might know that Cleveland, Ohio, is going through some tough times right now.
There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with it.
No Faith! At least wait a few minutes until rush hour is over. You're wearing a teddy bear backpack, everyone is gonna want to hit ya.
One of these days I'm going to bite you and I'm gonna get very, very sick.
TV is easier: it's all planned out for you and the audience is there to see a show and they are all pumped up but when you are in a comedy club, you have to be really funny to win them over.
Thanks Kate, and don't forget to call that number, there is no such thing as a little crack problem.
The economy is in trouble, schools are in trouble, and people have been leaving the city in droves for a long, long time.