Quotes & Jokes by Drew Carey / page 6
TV is easier: it's all planned out for you and the audience is there to see a show and they are all pumped up but when you are in a comedy club, you have to be really funny to win them over.
If I wasn't a comic or TV star, I really wanted to be a photojournalist.
The hardest diet I was ever on was the one when I was fat. You can only wear fat clothes, you dont feel good, your sex life gets damaged, you dont have energy for anything. Its horrible.
I honestly think that it automatically hurts me if I said that I supported the war in Iraq and I support the troops. That automatically kills me for getting a bunch of movies, a bunch of TV shows. People don't want to hear from me.
I think a lot of people are afraid of freedom. They want their lives to be controlled, to be put into a box... People like that cradle-to-grave concept because it says you don't have to think too much, you don't have to worry too much, because someone else is looking out for you. But that also means you can't do as much as you want. Why should someone else put a limit on how much fun I can have; how much I can accomplish?
Some people are like Slinkies - not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can get away with.
And for you kids watching at home, remember, the less homework you do and the closer you sit to the TV, the more points you get.
'Green Screen' was a total experiment. I'm glad we did it, but it was just tough on that network to get it going.
I don't get it, how does a guy look at his girlfriend without doubling over?
I like to think of my house as nothing more than a glorified console for my television; the ultimate stereo cabinet.
The first Monopoly game I played with my brothers, I hated losing so much, I just had to beat them.