Quotes & Jokes by Red Buttons / page 3
Joan Rivers, who said to Marcel Marceau, "Can we talk?" Never got a dinner!
Marie-Antoinette, who said to Louis, "Not tonight – this is my last headache." Never got a dinner!
Henry Ford, who despite his immense wealth never owned a Cadillac. Never got a dinner!
The Puerto Rican doctor, who wrote all his prescriptions with spray paint. Never got a dinner!
Adam, who said to Eve, "What do you mean you have nothing to wear?" Never got a dinner!
Long John Silver's wife, Short, who said to John, "If the shoe fits..." Never got a dinner!
Alexander Graham Bell’s wife, who said to Alex on their wedding night, "Your three minutes are up." Never got a dinner!
Peter Minuet, who said to the Indians in modern-day Manhattan, "Will you accept a check from a Puerto Rican bank?" Never got a dinner!
Billy Carter, who asked his brother Jimmy, "Do you think you could get me on the Gong Show?" Never got a dinner!
Saint Christopher, who said, "Where can I get a Frank Sinatra medal?" Never got a dinner!
Adam, who said to our Lord in the Garden of Eden, "I got more ribs - you got more broads?" Never got a dinner!
Eve, who asked Adam, "Does this fig leaf make me look fat?" Never got a dinner! (Got an apple, but never got a dinner.)