Quotes & Jokes by Richard Lewis / page 5

We can't agree on religion and guns and economics and sadly civil rights but if the wealthy won't chip in for the needy we are done.

The longer that I live the less time I have to worry.

I'm the first person in history to die in my own dream but It turned out only to be a stunt double.

When I was a kid my family said having feelings was an act of treason.

My parents didn't want to get divorced until they passed away.

If you have a date tonight, play it safe and leave your heart at home.

Acceptance and forgiveness are crucial components to a happy life and hopefully I can find mine in storage.

Perception is reality; so being so twisted I have no idea who I ever was which was a really lucky break.

I don't care what people think of me because I never cared what I thought about myself.

I'm looking forward to yesterday.

I can't sleep because I keep dreaming that I'm me...

You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar, but either way you've got flies.

I live in a predominantly anxious section of town.

I was having a great day until I woke up.

If you are going through an emotional nightmare be grateful that it is only a nightmare.