Quotes & Jokes by Adam Sandler / page 3


Some of us will never ever find true love. Take, for instance me. And I'm pretty sure that guy right there. And that lady with the sideburns. And basically everybody at table nine.

My movies just kind of sneak up on you. I don't have to worry too much about what everybody is going to say. Anyway, I really don't pay attention to what the world says about my movies. I just care about what my buddies think.

Never seen my friends do more push-ups, trying to challenge Cruises' manhood. It was like, "I can be strong, too!"

My comedy is different every time I do it. I don't know what the hell I'm doing.

I do want children. I study dads more. I watch what they go through. I admire my father more than I ever did and my brother and my sister.

Mama says that, alligators are onry cause they got all them teeth, but no toothbrush...

The problem with me, as far as getting married and having a family, is that my comedy is so important to me. So I don't know if I'll ever be as good a dad as my dad.

When I'm up there, and I know the show's coming to a close, in my head I'm saying to myself, Oh man, you gotta get off and be a normal person again. That's what I don't like so much.

I'd like to have a kid, and I'd like to be driving around. I know a kid is going to be a big part of my life. I can trust my kid. I know my kid would be in the backseat of my car, and when I say "You wanna get some ice-cream?" he's going to be happy. My brother has kids. I see that trick work, the ice cream trick.

Its too hot for a penguin out here come here mister penguin.

I still get very scared when I step in front of a live audience.

Stop looking at me swan.

First I asked her what time it is, right? Tomorrow I get to ask her the date, the day after that she's all over me. That's how it works, you play it slow.

I noticed you all were French, opposite of bonjour to you.

Having a kid is great... as long as his eyes are closed and he's not moving or talking.