Quotes & Jokes about Nowdays / page 2

26 quotes

It wasn't a cutdown to call someone a Mexican. It would kill my career to refer to someone as Mexican today. It's like calling me an American.

Today`s audiences are different only insomuch as today`s people are different, and I do not think today`s people are substantially different.

I feel today's society is so judgmental.

All the commercials on TV today are for antidepressants, for Prozac or Paxil. And they get you right away. "Are you sad? Do you get stressed, do you have anxiety?" "Yes, I have all those things! I'm alive!"

Guys play characters that won't grow up and something catastrophic happens and they have to grow up to save the day - that's pretty much what today's comedy is about.

What actresses do today when they appear on the screen is what they did once upon a time for getting to appear on the screen.

Children today know more about sex than I or my father did.

Jewish comics today are less jokey. Their humor comes at the end, rather than as in Vaudeville where the jokes came at you.

Being a Jewish comic today is a lot different than it was years ago. In fact I changed my name from Dudy to David when I first started to make my name less ethnic. Years later, agents urged me to change my name to something shorter and less Jewish and I told them I had already done that.

The worst thing about e-mail is that you can’t interrupt the other person. You have to read the whole thing and then e-mail them back, pointing out all their mistakes and faulty assumptions. It’s frustrating and it’s time-consuming. God bless phone calls.

Today being a stand-up means that you have to throw them a joke, then another and then another and then follow up with some kind of storytelling.