Quotes & Jokes about Respect / page 3

With my old man I got no respect. When he told me I should start at the bottom. He was teaching me how to swim.

How do we help the church get their respect back? I have a plan: pedophile crucifixions.

With my old man I got no respect. When he took me hunting he gave me a three minute head start. Then on the way home he tied me to the fender and put the deer in the car.

President Bush never really has to answer a question. Nobody ever says to him, "With due respect, sir, your answer had absolutely nothing to do with the question I asked."

I don't get no respect, are you kiddin'? The time I got hurt. On the way to the hospital, the ambulance stopped for gas.

I tell ya I get no respect from anyone. I bought a cemetary plot. The guy said, "There goes the neighborhood!"

If your belief is hateful towards people, I couldn’t respect that.

I don't get no respect, no respect at all!

With my old man I got no respect. He told me never take candy from a stranger unless he offered me a ride.

I tell ya when I fly, I don't get no respect. I took one of those cheap flights, no frills. I finished eatin' and had to do the dishes.

Last Christmas I got no respect. In my stocking, I got an odor-eater.

Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, 'Melissa you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep.'

When I was a kid I got no respect. I played hide-and-seek. They wouldn't even look for me.

He's really committed... to being an alcoholic, and I respect that.

I thought those two guys really vibed on each other. They seem to have a very respectful relationship. It felt really sincere. "I respect you, you respect me." And I'm not usually a big fan of sincerity.