Comedy Quotes & Jokes / page 1080
Why he would agree to install an eight-by-eight-foot fish tank and then not fill it with a single dolphin made me want to burn his eyebrows off.
The romance is dead if he drinks champagne from your slipper and chokes on a Dr. Scholl’s foot pad.
Ted Kennedy is endorsing John Kerry and I'm wondering, do you really want the endorsement of a guy with a Bloody Mary mustache?
We go out of our way to make people so different,... to punish them because of color, because of sex, because of size, and the game starts.
I before e except after c and sounding like a in a neighboring way and on weekends and holidays and all throughout May YOU'LL ALWAYS BE WRONG NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY!!!!
I’ve always had a special place in my heart for old women digging through garbage bins. They saved my life so many times as a baby.
People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job.
You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.
(While teaching his son to play baseball):<br /> "We're Mexi-cans not Mexi-can'ts."
