Quotes & Jokes about Embarrassment / page 2
This is embarrassing. My friend accidentally killed himself masturbating when he was just trying to kill himself.
Never let a woman put a condom on ya. Do it yourself fellas. It's embarrassing. "Oh look, oh look there's still more room! Ha Ha Ha! We could tie it off and use it again and again. Cause you've got a small penis; and I know, cause I work with children."
See I don't drink, I smoke. I used to drink, I did, I had to quit. Man, I was an embarrassing drunk. I'd get pulled over by the cops, I'd be so drunk I'd be out dancing to their lights thinking I'd made it to another club. Hey what is this, a leather bar? Hey I'm not into this, you faggots, oh SHIT!
It was awkward and embarrassing, but you have to go through things, ... I got through it and I'm happy it's over with and I can move forward and start playing.
There are all sorts of books offering advice on how to deal with life-threatening situations, but where's the advice on dealing with embarrassing ones?
I dated this woman for three weeks, and then she told me that she had a penis. I thought we were just role-playing. It was unbelievable. I was so shocked and embarrassed by it, it took me three more weeks to convince her to start wearing condoms.
We lived in a neighborhood that was too rich for us. When I was young, I had to deliver groceries to the homes of the kids I went to school with. I had to go to the back doors to make the deliveries. It was embarrassing. That was one thing out of a hundred.
Are there keys to a plane? Maybe that's what those delays are sometimes, when you're just sitting there at the gate. Maybe the pilot sits up there in the cockpit going, "Oh, I don't believe this. Dammit... I did it again." They tell you it's something mechanical because they don't want to come on the P. A. system, "Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to be delayed here on the ground for a while. I uh... Oh, God this is so embarrassing... I, I left the keys to the plane in my apartment. They're in this big ashtray by the front door. I'm sorry, I'll run back and get them."
If you do talk dirty, make sure that you enunciate because there's nothing more embarrassing than having to repeat yourself.
It turns out I was duped. I have no-one to blame but myself and boy is my face red... Now I need to apologise to the Lindsay Lohan family. I hope I didn't embarrass you and your family.
I didn’t have a priviledged childhood like a lot of you. I grew up on a public golf course and that’s embarrassing. I lived on the right side of the fairway. All these hacks slicing into your yard. You don’t hear “Fore!” while you’re mowing. “Nothing runs like a Deere.” ‘Til a Titleist is lodged in your carburator.
You know, if a woman falls over wearing heels, that's embarrassing, but if a bloke falls over wearing heels, then you have to kill yourself. It's the end of your life. Its quite difficult.
Rumer Willis was having a great time at the opening of a club when her twin walked in, also known as her dad, Bruce Willis. How embarrassing for her, she’s out with her friends and they’re like, ‘Umm, Rumer, I think your dad put something in my drink.’
A lot of controversy over this possible invasion of Iraq. In fact, Nelson Mandela was so upset, he called Bush's dad. How embarrassing, when world leaders start calling your father.