Quotes & Jokes about Men / page 4

Men are only as loyal as their options.

Women like silent men, they think they're listening.

Racecar driving is a lot like sex; all men think they're good at it.

There are battered husbands. Apparently this happens when the woman is real big, the man is very small, and they each drink a quart of whiskey a day.

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I believe when a woman enters a room, men should stand up - and gay men should stand up at least halfway.

Wise men say that time is like a river. I say time is like a river of shit... and as you float down that river in your little canoe, your paddles are getting smaller and smaller.

There’s only two types of men left in this world. Lumberjacks and Liam Nesson.

If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have heard it.

Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men.

If it weren’t for men, this planet would be overrun with giant spiders.